Is this the best or worst idea ever?

So... for those of you that have followed my blog you will be familiar with my beloved goat Bob and his tail injury. The short story: Bob is a three legged, two year old goat living on Johns Island that has recently suffered a severe bite to the tail from a stallion mini pony. If it sounds ridiculous, well it is. Yet what started as a simple (albeit untraditional) wound quickly turned into a debacle. As a wound located near the dirtiest place known to all mammals, it has been an insanely ridiculous challenge to help heal the open wound. Although the other people on the farm are worried about the survival of the goats, I am the only one with the resources and desire to help dedicate the time to heal them.

After antibiotics, daily visits, salves from fellow farmers, fencing to separate the horses from the goats, a vet visit, more antibiotics, and the use of tail bandages I thought I was making headway. Then the horses started breaking into the goat pen, the wound became even more infected, and I was burning the candle at both ends trying to deal with the whole issue. After a month of driving out to the island after work, discussions of putting the goat down became a topic of conversation on the farm and I realized that something was going to have to give.

So finally, I decided that the only way I could ensure constant care for my four legged ruminant was to bring it home. With a huge backyard, understanding neighbors, and two gated areas I figured we could pull it off despite living downtown. Technically it can be done legally in our area with signatures from our neighbors, but since we only planned on keep him for a week, we figured we could go with verbal approval until he was better. Dan was onboard, the farmer agreed, and we scooped up Bob for a road trip. With a bale of hay, a bag of feed, tennis balls on his horns for safety, and a bearded friend, Bob was escorted over the river and through the woods to our house downtown.

Bob and Dan bonded on the trip over in such a big way- he followed his every move like a shadow. Dan had built a manger inside our double fenced yard complete with bedding, food, and water. Once in his paddock, it became clear that our generally quiet friend was actually very vocal and was clearly worried about being alone. Every time he lost sight of Dan, he completely fell to pieces, bleating desperately, looking for his truck bed comrade. To help ease the transition, we worked in the yard, hung out near his pen, and hung out with him for a few hours. We pondered on the question: Is this the best idea ever or the worst idea ever? But as he settled in, he started munching on lettuce, hay, and grain. As it started to rain, he curled up for

the evening in his new home and started to drift off.

The next morning I woke up and headed out to the pen to check on our new roommate. When I opened the gate, he was no where to be found. We searched high and low but he was gone. My immediate thought was that he had been stolen because there was no way he could have gotten through two gates. We looked for clues, a note, anything but had no luck. Dan and I walked through our neighborhood, looking into yards and listening for goat cries while I teetered on the edge of hysteria at the thought of him being killed. Without any luck, we decided to call Animal Control to see if a loose goat had been reported. To our surprise, they knew all about it.

In the end, Animal Control had come in the middle of the night, gone through both gates, and taken Bob with out leaving so much as a note or a knock on the door. We ended up at the pound waiting for them to open and once they did, there was no goat. In the end, Bob had been taken to Veterinary Specialty Care in Mt. Pleasant. Thankfully, they were so gracious and loving towards our Bob- they shared our frustration with the situation and the lack of consideration that was given to the animal. So, after all of this, we ended up having to take Bob back to Johns Island.

In the end- I think it ended up falling into the "bad idea" category and I regret ever having put Bob in this position. The silver lining is that Dan and Bob have developed a new found love for each other and I have found a great new emergency vet.

The transformation of grief.

There are few things that change your life and leave you feeling more helpless and heartbroken than cancer. To watch someones body fail them while their alert mind looks on powerlessly can test you in ways you never expected and leave you questioning everything. When I was 13, I watched the grandfather that I adored beyond words vanish in a matter of months with lymphoma. At 22, I sat at the bedside of my great-uncle the day he learned that his stomach pain was actually a malignant tumor that would take his life in a matter of weeks. At 26 one of my childhood "adopted fathers" passed away with lung cancer and then not long after another one of my grandfathers was also taken. Over the last 8+ years I have also witnessed the slower battle my aunt fought and lost with breast cancer.

As I type this, one of my step-grandmothers (the family tree is a bit confusing) is slipping away due to pancreatic cancer. I spoke with her yesterday for what will likely be the last time. The conversation started with light joking but before long I found myself desperate to tell her all of things I want her to know in case it was my only chance. We are never really taught the language of dealing with an impending loss but we are instead given default phrases like "you are in our thoughts and prayers" to use as crutches. Instead I told her all of the things I would tell everyone else at her funeral because that is what I would want to hear. I told her that she has always made me laugh with her no-nonsense commentary and wry sense of humor; I let her know how lucky I have felt to have her as a part of my life; and for the first time in knowing her I told her how much I love her.

If there is any grace in cancer, it is found in the time left to say goodbye. For those that survive, it is also the life changing perspective and new found appreciation for every new day. I am thankful to not have lost everyone that I have loved who has been diagnosed with cancer or else this list would be much longer.

Perhaps this tragic dance with death has played a role in who I have become and why I try to constantly push every day to the fullest.

I found this beautiful quote from the Center for Loss and Trauma by Dr. Joanne Cacciatore that captures many of the feelings associated with cancer:

This great undertaking.
This grief.

I don’t believe I have the power
to face it alone.

To conquer the helplessness, the desperation, the agony
in every cell of my body. The pain that winds its way
from the tips of my hair to the tips of my toes.

For the first time in my life
I realize
that I have changed.
That I need others.

Gluten Free in the Holy City

Check out the article I wrote for City Paper on living gluten-free in Charleston.

Imagine that for your entire life you have felt sick. Between the fatigue, stomach pains, and nausea, you have been stuck in an endless cycle of dining roulette. The doctors assume that you are "just sensitive" and treat these symptoms with a variety of medications, but they never find the cause. Yet the older you get, the worse it gets. Before long, there have been visits to specialists, countless tests with inconclusive results, and the uncomfortable feeling that everyone thinks you are a hypochondriac. As the symptoms increase, it becomes impossible to lead a normal life out of fear that your stomach may stage a revolt, especially when it comes to traveling or even spending a day at the beach. You may or may not have been pulled over when speeding for a bathroom and forced by sheer desperation to throw your wallet at the officer's face while yelling, "I am about to shit my pants" and screeching off toward your house. Needless to say, your life is scoring a wee bit low on the fun-scale.

Then the day comes when you are told that there is a cure for what ails you and you will only have to give up one thing and one thing only to feel better: gluten. So, what is the big deal? It is only one little thing, right? And besides, what the hell is gluten anyway?

I can tell you firsthand that giving up gluten is no small feat. For many other gluten-sensitive people, their experiences mirror those described above. In the case of Michael Varnadore of Summerville, he found his answers through two-and-half-years of trial and error. His biggest challenge was gaining a complete understanding of what gluten is and in which products it can be found.

As Varnadore and I have both discovered, gluten's senior superlative was evidently for the "most popular food additive." It is a protein composite found in food processed from wheat, barley, rye, spelt, kamut, and oats. It is valued for its ability to give elasticity to dough, bind ingredients together, and provide a source of protein. In a nutshell, it makes things light, fluffy, and delicious.

From the obvious foods such as bread and pasta to less obvious items like luncheon meat, soy sauce, and french fries, gluten has made its way into almost every product in the grocery store. Just to make things even more complicated, it is not always explicitly named in the ingredients list, which is why there are now a number of companies labeling their products as gluten free. If this sounds a little overwhelming, then you can begin to understand how avoiding it can be more of an art than a science.

Instead of focusing on what cannot be eaten, sometimes it is easier to find out what you can eat. Fresh fruit, vegetables, beans, brown rice, eggs, alternative flours, dairy, tofu, seafood, and certified meat are all safe. There are a number of companies making gluten-free products including bread, snacks, desserts, cereal, and beer, although they will make a serious dent in your wallet.

There are millions of people like Varnadore and me who are negotiating these dietary challenges, yet not everyone has the same gluten-related issues. The spectrum of reactions to gluten can be divided into the following groups: wheat allergy, celiac disease, and gluten sensitivity. Wheat allergies are similar to other food allergies; they can cause hives, respiratory distress, and nausea. Those with celiac suffer from an inflammatory reaction in the digestive system when they are exposed to gluten; the reaction damages the villi (tiny hairs) in the small intestine and leads to the inability to absorb nutrients. Symptoms range from diarrhea to stomach pain, mouth ulcers, lactose intolerance, weight loss, anemia, migraines, lethargy, and joint pain. If you do not get diagnosed or choose to ignore the disease after you have been, you may end up suffering from malnutrition or developing intestinal cancer, diabetes, and other debilitating conditions.

My condition isn't quite as dire. I suffer from gluten sensitivity. Unfortunately, others like me exhibit the symptoms of celiac, but they test negative for a wheat allergy and celiac disease. However, they can alleviate their symptoms by switching to a gluten-free diet.

According to the Mayo Clinic, an estimated one in 100 people suffer from celiac, although many of them are undiagnosed and millions more are gluten sensitive. Although there is no definite number, recent studies have shown that gluten intolerance has steadily increased over the last 50 years. What is causing this rise in the number of cases? A variety of factors are believed to contribute, including an improved capability for diagnosis, the increase of gluten in diets, and the significant rise in other health conditions due to poor lifestyle choices.

Unfortunately for many individuals, it may take years to get diagnosed with a gluten-related condition. Kellen Lawson, an astrophysics major at College of Charleston, was diagnosed with celiac last November after a lifetime of stomach issues, blinding migraines, and malnourishment. Thanks to the keen eye of a friend's mother, a nurse practitioner, he finally underwent testing. Like many individuals who are unable to digest gluten, he is also lactose intolerant, adding yet another challenge to his diet. He has spent the last year learning how to cope with the disease while also attending class, working, and having a social life. Naturally, the things he misses the most are really good pizza and being able to eat out anywhere with friends. The silver lining is that his migraines and stomach pain are gone and he has learned how to prepare the majority of his meals from scratch, which is a good thing, since he says his friends and family "still have no idea what gluten is."

Luckily for Varnadore, Lawson, and many others, more and more people are aware of gluten allergies and celiac disease. There are currently dozens of gluten-free websites, new products on the market, cookbooks, and even gluten-free restaurants. Most major cities have an impressive selection of eateries, grocery stores, and meet-up groups interested in finding gluten-free, vegetarian, locally sourced, raw, vegan, or nut-free food.

So how does Charleston fare in the gluten-free world? Most of the large grocery store chains in the area carry gluten-free products, with Whole Foods, Trader Joe's, Earth Fare, Harris Teeter, and Bi-Lo among the best. As for local restaurants, there seems to be a few leading the charge while others slowly get on board.

Tarteletteblog.com's Helene Dujardin, a writer, chef, and fellow gluten avoider, feels that Charleston restaurants still need a lot of education and training when it comes to food allergies. Although local chefs have demonstrated their culinary talents by showcasing local products and creating delicious meals for the all-eating omnivores, she believes that they are still a long way off from addressing dietary restrictions in their menus. Dujardin explains that this is an issue that goes beyond the chefs and begins with those on the front lines: the waitstaff. As the middlemen for the restaurants, the front-of-house staff must accurately communicate the capabilities of the kitchen and, in turn, explain the needs of the customers to the chefs.

Chef Michael Carmel, culinary department head at the Culinary Institute of Charleston, is working on addressing these issues. His students are trained on how to handle food allergies and preferences through a variety of courses from kitchen sanitation to menu development. Carmel believes that catering to those with dietary restrictions, whether it is gluten, nuts, or animal products, "is not only a business opportunity but it is essential." In his eyes, ignoring these groups is limiting your customer base and missing an incredible opportunity to stand out.

Rebecca Powell, head of the Gluten.net Chef to Plate program, echoes this sentiment. "Gluten-free customers are very loyal. If they have a good experience, they come back with their friends and family," she says. Chef to Plate is a national program designed to help restaurants create staff and customer awareness about gluten-free dining by providing free educational materials and listing participating restaurants online. In addition to this program, Gluten.net also provides industry audits and certifications for those interested in getting the gluten-free label for their product.

Although there are not currently any Charleston restaurants participating in the Chef to Plate program, a handful have started to train their staff and create gluten-free menus, including Five Loaves Café, Crave, Caviar and Bananas, Patat Spot, Mustard Seed, Fat Hen, the Daily Dose, 82 Queen, Basil, Café Kronic, Glass Onion, East Bay Deli, Hominy Grill, S.N.O.B., Charleston Crab House, Chai's, and Mellow Mushroom.

Patat Spot owner Phillis Kalisky Mair has always catered to customers with food allergies at her European friet and falafel snack bar thanks in part to her sister's own gluten sensitivity. The restaurant boasts gluten-free falafel, gluten-free fries, and homemade pita, and it will soon offer gluten-free beer and desserts. In addition to catering to those with gluten allergies, she is also conscious of people who are allergic to nuts. Although Mair acknowledges that it is a little more expensive to make some of the products, she has attracted a loyal fanbase. "So many people have food allergies and they have to continuously worry about cross-contamination," Mair says. "We have had customers come in, see our selection, realize that we understand their challenges, and they literally jump up and down."

Chef Fred Neuville of Fat Hen has received similar praise from customers for his wide variety of gluten-free options, accommodating kitchen, and well-versed staff. He relishes crafting new items for the menu that can be enjoyed by customers with food allergies. "There are so many things that you can make gluten free," he says. "Why not make something great so people can come in and enjoy themselves?" After taking a look at the menu, it's easy to see that he is putting thought into action. From gluten-free boiled peanut salad and crab cakes to duck confit and butternut squash rice, Fat Hen makes eating gluten-free dishes seem like fine dining.

When most gluten-free individuals are asked what culinary delights they miss most, two of the most common answers are pizza and beer — especially if the person you're asking is me. Thankfully, Michael Shemtov, co-owner of Mellow Mushroom's King Street and Avondale locations, listened to the collective voices demanding delicious gluten-free pizza and beer. While working at the Mellow Mushroom corporate office in Atlanta, he saw an increasing number of e-mails from customers that had spent their lives loving pizza and beer, only to discover they could no longer have it. Not only were these customers no longer able to come into the pizzeria, but it meant that their families and friends would be coming in less often as well.

"Gluten-free customers have the veto power on eating out with their family, friends, and co-workers, so it is not just about those living without gluten," Shemtov says. "Not catering to these individuals is very shortsighted."

Over a span of two years, the company partnered with a number of gluten-free companies to develop the signature dough they now offer in their restaurants. Pair this dough with a well-trained staff, a separate prep area, and a bottle of Estrella Damm Daura beer, and gluten-free magic is made. Recently, the West Ashley Mellow Mushroom hosted a private gluten-free party in which the entire restaurant was scrubbed down and they served gluten-free friendly food to over 150 customers. Shemtov encourages restaurants to tap into this enthusiastic crowd that he describes as "tremendously loyal" and "very well networked with one another."

In the end, the consensus seems to be that the Holy City has much to learn about gluten sensitivity — but it's getting there. To support and encourage this growth in gluten-free understanding, the first ever Gluten/Allergen Free Expo in Charleston will be kicking off on May 5 from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. at the Omar Shrine Convention Center at Patriots Point in Mt. Pleasant. There will be gluten-free vendors and presentations from nutritionists, doctors, and chefs speaking on gluten-free living. Check out the event website, charlestongfafexpo.blogspot.com, for more info.

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Top 10 Gluten-Free Must Haves

1. Udi brand products, from bread to muffins

2. So Delicious Coconut Milk Beverage

3. Glutino brand products, especially the bagel chips

4. Diggity Doughnuts' gluten-free cinnamon-sugar donut holes

5. Redbridge gluten-free beer

6. Patat Spot bean potato cakes with cucumber dill sauce and friets

7. Pamela's Products' gluten-free flour mix

8. Five Loaves Café's soups

9. Gluten-free Chex cereal

10. Vegetarian burger from HoM sans bun

Dan, my chicken man, is at it again. Check out the latest addition to our backyard homestead- the mobile chicken tractor. Using almost completely reclaimed materials, Dan has constructed this sexy little coop at a remarkable speed. Our chateau de chickens will serve as double duty: it provides new forage for our chickens while putting them to work preparing our garden beds by weeding and fertilizing at once. For the next few weeks, the chickens will be moved around the empty beds to get them ready for our spring planting- hooray for backyard chickens!

A Goats Tale

Wednesday I started my day off one of the best ways a person can...on a farm. As if this is not great enough, there was the added bonus of baby animals. Within minutes of walking onto Jeremiah Farm and Goat Dairy I was on the ground cuddling newborn goats. The youngest one was two days old, all legs and curiosity. Its little hooves were so soft and tiny it melted my heart. Yet unlike his sisters, this little guy is not a hot commodity (being a male on a dairy farm) which means he is destined to either end up as a pet or sadly, on someone's dinner plate. It is easy to see people fall in love and adopt this four legged critters when they are sucking on your fingers and staring at you with their trusting square eyes.

For many people, the temptation to adopt baby farm animals is very great, regardless of their experience or housing. I have heard countless stories of people taking in baby chickens, ducks, goats, horses, pigs, etc. only to learn hard lessons in the care, knowledge, and budget it takes to care for these unique creatures. There was even a goat living on Folly beach inside (yep.) someones house. Beyond the need for space, specialized food, medication, and companionship, the often overlooked aspect is the lack of veterinary care available for farm animals. Unlike a dog or a cat owner, those with farm animals often must take matters into their own hands. Medical advice is exchanged online, from owner to owner, and at the local farm supply stores. This is a lesson that I had to learn the hard way with Billy the Goat, who did not survive long enough for me to even understand the problem that led to his demise.

Read about Billy's story here and here .

Even after such a traumatic experience, I found myself wearing rose colored glasses and before i knew it I was wondering if I could sneak a baby goat into downtown without causing a stir. As fate would have it, I actually ended my day with my old adult goat friends and was brought back to reality. I try to stop by and see them at least once a month if not every two weeks to make sure they are doing okay. Bob and Peanut are still hanging in there and now they are kept company by their younger sister Peaches and their two new pony pen-mates.

During my routine corral check, deworming, and hoof trimming, I noticed that Bob was spending a lot of time on the ground. As a three-legged goat, this isn't incredibly odd behavior, but he usually runs to the gate to greet me. When I gave him a once over, nothing was obviously wrong beside a small scratch above his tail. Yet if you are going to own a goat, you also always have to check the back-end to make sure they are no blockages or worms (not so cute now, huh?). That is when I discovered a deep wound hidden under the base of his tail that was oozing with infection. It took both Joseph and I to hold him down so I could clean it up enough to inspect it (while gagging) as Bob screamed the most heartbreaking sound of fear and discomfort. We called our go-to goat people with no avail and since the stores were closed, I headed over to Kipp's house to see if he had any advice or medication. Thankfully he was home and after a long discussion, I left with antibiotics, a tutorial on giving an antibiotic shot to a goat, and syringes. I headed back to the goat pen and illuminated by my headlights, I gave Bob his medication.

For the last two days, I have spend my evenings after work collecting supplies (including pro-biotics, wound cleaning spray, gauze, etc.) and administering drugs to my patient. It appears as though the wound is getting better but as mentioned, I am no expert and it is extremely hard to examine him. Having lost one goat in a matter of days, the last thing I want to do is miss something obvious that could stop his slide downhill. Even as I write this, I am thinking of things I should do, like check his temperature, the color of his gums, and the whites of his eyes.

My hope in sharing this experience is to give people a reality check before falling victim to the temptation to adopt cute baby animals and instead support the family farms that spend their lives caring for these animals by going to visit them.

I personally know of a few goats (and their respective farmers) that would love to have you stop by for a visit.